Because depression is not exclusive to introverts.

There is this stigma out there that introverts are depressed and unhappy.  Truth be told, I’m probably one of the most positive people I know.  I’ve had my struggles with depression, but I’ve taken the time to learn and truly understand myself. Moral of the story is, learn and understand yourself so that you won’t be depressed!  Post complete!  Thanks for reading.

If only it were that easy.

It’s important to understand that introversion has nothing to do with depression.  Because we find peace in solitude, avoid small talk and despise abnormally large settings, it is perceived that we are generally unhappy people. That is completely untrue. As mentioned in a previous post, too many people can drain our energy which will drain our mood.  Constantly leaving early or wanting to stay home can be viewed as depression or unhappiness but exposing ourselves to the latter can actually be self-destructive.

The truth about depression.

It can happen to anyone.  Introverts. Ambiverts. Extroverts.  People suffer from depression. From 2016 to mid-2017 I suffered from a horrible bout of depression.  I was at a point in my life where I felt completely worthless and didn’t see the purpose of getting out of bed and living a productive life.  I knew about affirmations but the truth is, if you don’t believe in what you’re saying, they’re pointless.  I believed in God but I didn’t really know how to feel Him again.  I knew I was blessed but I was unable to look past what I didn’t have instead of focusing on what I do have.  Either way you looked at it, my glass was borderline empty and I had no desire to fill it up.

When I mustered up the energy to address my unhappiness, I realized it stemmed from feeling unfulfilled.  God puts you on earth with purpose unique to you.  When you spend your days not living in your purpose, it can weigh on your heart.  A lot of us are walking around simply surviving each day.  The minute we attempt to LIVE, is the minute you begin to walk in God’s purpose for you.  Depression is scary.  It’s a feeling that not many can understand.  There were days I didn’t leave my bed.  I exhausted all my sick, vacation, personal and floater days.  I began working from home as a way to stay in my bed.  I was a mess.

How I overcame depression.

Where do I start? To be completely transparent, I sought out the help of a professional.  He diagnosed me with social anxiety (duh), depression (duh) and anxiety (again, duh).  He put me on medication that stabilized my mood.  Once I began to feel better emotionally, I actively worked on addressing my issues.  What did I want? To be successful.  What was holding me back? Fear.  How was I going to address this?  That’s where the work came in.  I incorporated crystals, sage and mediation into my everyday spiritual diet.  I learned to speak highly of myself.  I learned to affirm my greatness and who God created me to be.  More importantly, I learned that other people’s thoughts of me had nothing to do with me.  Sometimes people will see your light and try to blow it out with their negative projections.  I enforced the fact that my calling is exclusive to me.  I lived in the idea of the law of attraction.  Want to be happy? Then be it.  That was it.  I decided I wanted to live in a limitless world.   Gradually I began to build myself up into a person determined to reach their fullest potential.

I quit what no longer served me.  If you were a source of negativity, you had to go.  Physical items, friends and employment included.  As I began to let these things go, I began to evolve as a person.  It was beautiful!

Today.

I am weening myself off of my medication and I have successfully adopted an homeopathic routine that has me feeling better than ever.  Take your vitamins, kids!  My medication did it’s job, but I think it’s important I hold myself accountable for my mood.  While my state of mind has improved 100%, the withdrawal symptoms I experience are enough to keep me in bed for a few days.  In exactly one week I will be free of antidepressants but I am completely confident I’ll be able to a healthy, positive state of mind.

I wanted to share my story because depression is real.  While this year was one of the scariest of my life, it was also the most freeing.  I’ve learned to look at things differently.  Instead of being 100% pissed off when someone wrongs me, I take the time to evaluate what their mental state of mind is.  How are they feeling?  What are they going through to cause them to act the way they did?  Sometimes it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.  I learned to judge less and love more.  I am so thankful God doesn’t judge us all the way we judge each other.  I also realized that I was an introvert before, during and after my depression.  Lastly, I realized depression is more common that we thought.

Let’s start talking about it!